Why relationships are so vital in business
Part 6 — The Counterfeit Reality
by John Counsel
This is the fake “reality” that surrounds us, even presses itself on us… the negative, undesirable reality that nobody in their right mind wants, posing as the positive, desirable reality that we all want — with one HUGE difference…
No time, no effort and no discipline are needed!
(Yeah… right. Another “quick fix” barker’s egg.)
Take a good hard look at the attributes of this version of reality and you’ll recognise them. They’re all too familiar to us. When reality dawns on those struggling with this scenario, the mask is soon whipped away to reveal the negative, undesirable reality it really is — the “wolf in sheep’s clothing.”
As always, you’re the ultimate cause. You’ll reap what you sow.
The reason that this one is so common is simple: ignorance, laziness, greed, fear and stupidity — just the qualities you really want in business associates when you want to create long term stability and financial security! (Yeah… right again!)
Next – Comparison summary of the three realities
Overview | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Comparison | Links
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#1: The Basis of the Relationship |
| Counterfeit Reality: Betrayal (treachery) toward the other person. The desire to see YOU benefit from the relationship — at their expense. Ill will posing as good will to lull them into a sense of false security. |
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#2: Your Personal Motives, Attitudes and Behaviour |
| Counterfeit Reality: Win-lose motives, win-lose attitudes and win-lose behaviour. The right things done for the wrong reasons. Becomes lose-lose as soon as the loser wakes up. (It was always lose-lose — you were kidding yourself if you thought otherwise. It’s just lose-lose posing as a win to fool you, and you fell for it.) |
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#3: Your Character |
| Counterfeit Reality: Hypocrisy – compromise posing as integrity. We’re unsafe to deal with because we’re unpredictable (we do the right things for the wrong reasons) and we’re undesirable, despite initial appearances. Words may conceal, but actions will ultimately reveal. |
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#4: Internal Effect |
| Counterfeit Reality: Vanity, conceit — the automatic, internal effect of hypocrisy. It doesn’t depend on the other person or anyone else. We know what our character is like. We do not trust ourselves — but we put on a false front for everyone else. Self contempt posing as self esteem. (Really just self flattery, where the person hearing and believing it is as dumb as the person telling them.) |
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#5: Their Perception of YOU |
| Counterfeit Reality: Uncertainty. Something’s not quite right. You’re not safe to deal with because you’re not predictable and you’re undesirable… you have NO integrity, despite your clever cover-up. |
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#6: Emotional Response |
| Counterfeit Reality: Contracts and guarantees — mistrust posing as trust. “Yes, I trust you… just sign this contract to protect me in case you turn out to be untrustworthy.” |
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#7: Behavioural Response |
| Counterfeit Reality: “Yes” meaning “no” – refusal posing as consent. You only THINK you have the use of her resources. |
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#8: Conditions |
| Counterfeit Reality: Self-indulgence, delusion — limitations and dependence posing as freedom. “I can give this up any time I choose.” “Of course I’ll respect you in the morning!” “You don’t have to do anything — we’ll build your business for you!” And so it goes. |
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#9: Accomplishment |
| Counterfeit Reality: Imitation — the most futile human accomplishment. Destruction posing as creativity. Cardboard cutouts with no minds of their own. “Dressed for success.” “Faking it 'til they make it.” To see it in real, living colour, visit any nightclub or disco — or too many “sales motivation” meetings. Warning: Imitation should not be mistaken for emulation. They’re not the same thing. Instead of imitating the effects of success, emulate the causes. |
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#10: Result |
| Counterfeit Reality: Confusion… frustration… disappointment. Failure posing as success! “Why isn’t this working? I’m dressing for success and faking it 'til I make it... I don’t understand! I’ve read all the ‘how-to’ books!” |
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#11: Fulfilment |
| Counterfeit Reality: Shallow pleasure (usually at someone else’s expense). Cheap thrills. Always with a sting in the tail — a hangover, disease, regrets and recrimination, etc that add up to a damaged relationship. Misery posing as “fun”. Very temporary. And a bitter after-taste. |
